Friends
Christmas is all about family. The opportunity to experience the ritual of family gatherings and a religious experience. Then New Years comes and we perform the ritual of promise. Promising to do things better. The promise of performing the tasks we failed to achieve this past year. The promise of taking better care of ourselves and the people around us. The promise of a better year or maybe that is just a hope. A more achievable promise would be the promise of acknowledging the present and the small gifts you could receive every day through the act of being present..
Case in point -
Two days after Christmas I experienced what I will call a friends day. It began with a cappuccino with the husband and wife team that own a fabulous Italian restaurant in Sausalito. We were at a good replica of an authentic Italian pasticceria. It was a different conversation than a customer/owner conversation. It was just three friends talking about the challenges of life and the need to find that space in ones life to recharge from the stress of the daily grind. It was also the kind of conversation that makes for a lasting friendship.
My coffee with friends was followed by a four mile walk with another friend — she also poses as my daughter. It’s one of the great benefits of parenting. If you stay the course, those children turn into your friends and those friends are often better than family. As we walked through the beautiful foothills of Mt. Tam, the benefit of recent rainfalls was on display. Formerly dry creeks were now alive with rushing water. The moist air clung to the trees heavy with the rich color of green recently bestowed on the branches thanks to weeks of rain. It was in this beautiful backdrop that we were able to discuss the issues of our lives. Not as father and daughter but like friends without the judgement curated by family dynamics.
My final Friends experience was a drink at “The NoName Bar . A growing friendship with a couple of guys in the hotel business. Not investors but front line people. You know the people you first see, that set the tone of your experience. In a similar way that the host at a fine restaurant either makes your evening memorable or forgettable regardless of the food. This conversation went from bar to dinner and probably ended a little late. The price of a slow start to the next day was well worth the broad reaching conversation and reminiscences of the Bay Area and the characters who lived in Southern Marin.
It wasn’t yet 2022 but I was proud of myself for seizing the moment of these interactions with friends. Chose not to rush off, or feign the importance of a nonexistent meeting. I chose to stay the course and make myself sincere, available and present. A lot more rewarding than losing 10 pounds.
Happy New Year