My First Crush & The Word Part II
Sunny and 75 degrees with a four-foot swell and an off-shore breeze; a perfect day for surfing. Tragically, I was cleaning my room in preparation for lunch!!! Really?! I thought it was summer vacation. The only redeeming part was Charlene would be coming with her parents. My parents were not Victorians but they were in transition between full-on Victorian and the Greatest Generation. My father worked for Lockheed Aircraft toward the end of World War II. He and my mother definitely raised their children in a “proper” fashion. There were strict rules and those were adhered to at all times. One of those rules was general respect for the English language. After all, my father was an attorney and took great pride in his ability to write and his use of language. In spite of its versatility, the word Fuck was not on my family’s vocabulary list of useful or versatile words. In fact, I cannot recall a time when I ever heard my father or mother use the word regardless of its multiple functions. Here is a partial list demonstrating the true versatility of this one four-letter word.
Interjection: Fuck! I stubbed my toe.
Noun: I hit the fuck out of the ball.
Complementary: You are so fucking good.
Apathy: Who gives a fuck!
Fraud: They fucked me over.
Enjoyment: I had a fucking good time at the party!
Anger: Fuck!
Ignorance: Fuck if I know.
Displeasure: What the fuck is happening?
Resignation: I guess I am fucked now.
Suggestion: Get the fuck out of here.
Trouble: I guess I am fucked now.
Adjective: He is a fucking moron. That’s fucking stupid. Look at that fucking ______
It is the adjective form that ruined my day and my lunch with Charlene. They arrived…there was plenty of how are you; you look great; are you ready to return to school; summer’s almost over etc. The adults were seated at one table and the rest of us at the “kid’s table”. My younger sister, I have no idea where my older sister was, Charlene and her brother Charles. We were actually having a fun time chatting about this and that. I was feeling very accomplished as I was included in the conversation. I mean we were kind of like adults and the age gap was narrowing. Then I got ahead of myself. Newport Blvd was a modestly busy street, not horrible, but enough traffic that a blockage would have cause some inconvenience. As we were eating, I was looking out the window and I saw a truck backing into the middle of the street without regard to the oncoming traffic…. “Look at that Fucking Truck,” I said in an authoritative and incredulous voice to demonstrate my disappointment in the driver’s behavior and mental acuity. The next event happened at warp speed and Star Wars wasn’t even in theaters. My father instantly materializes at my side with a crushing grab of my arm and suddenly I was beamed into my room with a…” I never want to hear that word from you again”. Party Over!!!!!
I cannot remember if I had dinner that night but I do know I did not see Charlene again as by the time I had recovered from my embarrassment we had all returned to Arcadia and school. From my perspective, It all seemed so wrong, I mean what the fuck was that driver doing backing into the street like that? And, fuck, was grounding and exiled to my room in the middle of lunch with Charlene really fucking necessary.? From my father’s perspective --- Sure the fuck was!!!!
Once was not enough… The F-Word Part III