August 18th
This blog is essentially observations of life through my lens. By definition, it is personal but not so personal as to expose things that occurred in one’s lifetime that were embarrassing or hurtful; as if writing about them would heal the wounds. The genesis for this blog occurred while I was packing up 15 years after selling my treasured ranch. I was looking for a letter my father had written while I was in college. I was reminded of this letter as my thoughts turned to the memory of my father on the occasion of his birthday – August 18th. He was by every measure a brilliant and accomplished individual. One of the things he did particularly well was writting letters. He didn't write using electronics or a computer. He wrote letters with a fountain pen and paper. The letter in question was sent to me during my first year at UC Santa Barbara. Unlike my brilliant sisters, both of whom attended Stanford University, I attend UC Santa Barbara which was at the time more noted as a party school versus the well-respected academic institution of today. After my first semester, shockingly, I found myself on academic probation. My father wrote one of the best letters I have ever received, explaining to me that higher education was an opportunity and privilege not afforded to everyone. Furthermore, he and my mother were making this opportunity available to me at no cost. He went on to explained that he was disappointed I had not respected the largess bestowed upon me through their generosity. Put in simple terms, if I didn't get my act together immediately, that financial support was going to conclude forthwith. This very troubling message was so well written I wanted to share it to my children. As hard as I might look and as many boxes as I rifled through I could not find this letter. There are many reasons why it could not be found. The principle reason —— over time paper like memories tends to disintegrate as it was moved from box to box sandwiched in between less important documents like old bank statements and utility bills being saved for posterity. The realization that if I wanted my children and their children to have a sense of their father, now of the legacy age, I would have to find a better way of preserving my pearls of wisdom. Thus, I decided that writing a blog would create a permanent record (as we know nothing leaves the internet) of my thoughts; beliefs, and observations of life. They might be curious about how I felt about life and understood life through my eyes. Thus “E Solo Un Trucco” was born – a life lived of importance to those closest to me.
I called my sister on the eve of our father's birthday to say hello and speak of our father. I don't talk to my sister every day our communication would be described as sporadic. It’s not something I'm necessarily proud. As my children know, I am always hopeful that they will communicate more frequently with each other as life does not give you a second chance. My sister had called earlier to wish me a happy birthday. She was well aware that our father's birthday was today, the 18th. During our conversation. she said she read my blog every Wednesday. Upon hearing this an enormous sense of pride came over me. I deeply respect both of my sisters who have achieved multiple degrees and succeeded in many avenues. I was super proud that my oldest sister would think that this blog was worth reading and reading every week. As I remembered my father on his birthday, he would have smiled at the idea that his offspring would be in communication with each other.
I know my other sister also reads my blog. These two respected women reading my writing consistently gives me such a feeling of pride and joy. This sense of accomplishment and validation from two people who I care about would, on the day of his birth, make my father extraordinarily proud. Proud that his offspring were still part of each other’s lives and part of an extended family which started with this accomplished gentleman who amongst many things wrote a beautiful letter.
With love,
Happy Birthday Dad