A Different Approach

I wanted to write something positive this week.   I wanted to write about the value of accepting differing points of view.    But I could not…..If we cannot see the value of an alternative, then the discussion ends and the connection is severed.  This is what we do – state your view – stop listening – shut down.  Find a way to end the discussion because it is not going your way.  Good connection requires empathy.  If you cannot understand another learned behavior there is no chance of resolution or continuing the conversation. 

Case in point.  I was checking up on an old friend who is a global citizen.  In other words, he has spent his life making money and avoiding taxes.  No reason to feel responsible for others, pay a fair share or any share for that matter.  The war came up, I criticized the approach and was told to be “realistic”--translated -- the only way to solve problems is to destroy your adversary.   I responded -- that attitude is exactly why we keep repeating history.  Diplomacy is so much harder than the alternative.  When I suggested a different model, he started blaming Biden and Clinton – you see where this is going --- nowhere.  Blaming the past does not create solutions for the present…..Result: Conversation over.

If we refuse to change the model the result will be the same.  People, infrastructure and countries are clearly expendable.  Those that want to negotiate are still accused of appeasement – an unfortunate relic of The World War. Am I the one who lacks the intelligence to not believe this is the only way to solve problems?  Am I supposed to believe that the men who started this war are somehow so smart that they figured out how to solve the problem of differing cultures, religious beliefs, and agendas?  Are these creative geniuses or are they just copying off someone else’s test? These are men who have no more intelligence than the ones who started the wars before them.  An intelligent person, perhaps a woman, would try a different approach.  This is a failed effort from an old playbook.  Maybe it is time to rethink?  Perhaps listening, connecting, empathy, and understanding might have resulted in a different outcome. 

That would take intelligence….