The Tour
I am sad this morning, perhaps melancholy is more accurate. It is transition that brings about this feeling of loss. I am reviewing the last few days of events and perhaps missed opportunity as one might review life's missed opportunities.
I have just concluded a travel tour with a group of people I did not know, save two **(more on that later). It was a group of 10 couples all of whom had been together as partners for somewhere between 30-40 years!! Being in a relationship with a partner that long is an achievement I could not approach even on a cumulative basis. As my dear friend said i don't think Fred has ever spent this much time with people within a decade of his age . Now we know that's not true after all I did go to grammar school . I digress.
This tour was my first such travel experience. There were many things about the tour of the Provence region of France which were not perfect but I think we would sell the trip and us short if that is what one were to focus on. It is just too easy to find the negative in our circumstance. The positive argument is somehow always the most difficult position in the debate. At its highest value this tour was the opportunity to meet people whose life experience was different than yours. Thus it challenged us all to be open to relate our personal journey with others. Relationships take time to develop and in this moment one could see relationships go from polite introduction to sincere curiosity. After all we shared this moment together and thus we were not only observers but creators of a mutual experience. Now it is complete, bringing into stark reality that there is in all things a beginning and an end and thus this wave of melancholy.
However we will be rescued from the abyss as we reflect, in the days ahead, of the risk we took to travel with others -- to put ourselves into an unfamiliar place and we will smile at the positive experience we shared together.
**(More on that later)
Daisy and Greg invited me to go on this trip. I had another vision but my travel companion lost her way and thus I lost mine. I have had some decision making challenges recently but my decision to be their "plus 1 " was not one of them. Traveling together is not for the faint of heart, but I looked forward to everyday with my friends. Together, we were good travellers. No hard rules, flexible, humor and a willingness to take risk. Willing to expose our weaknesses and our hopes. Those conversations can be risky but as trust develops it all becomes seamless. We were friends but now we are really friends. My hope is that we won't let our lives get in the way of more adventures. For me this trip will mark the beginning of a beautifully deepen friendship.
As I reflect on all that has transpired over the last week, I am grateful that I have been given this opportunity. Yet as I transition to another destination, I am feeling that tinge of melancholy.
Un abbraccio fortissimo i miei amichi..
"Don't cry because it's over, be happy because it happened." .... Dr Seuss
Frankly, I'm more comfortable with----
"It's my party and I'll cry if I want to, cry if I want to"...Lesley Gore