Maître d’
Now here's a story…
Restaurants and the hospitality business are key components to a culture of human interaction and relationship building. The people of this industry are the stalwart bastion of true human connectivity. Leave your cell phone in the car and enjoy the evening.
I couldn't decide what to title this piece: three women -- three nurses --- three moms --- Maître d’
My favorite San Francisco restaurant is Boulevard. It was established 30 years ago by my good friend Nancy Oakes. She is a pioneering chef and mentor to many over the last decades. She is admired not only as a talented chef but for her generosity and vision. The restaurant survived the 1989 earthquake and, like many, the Coved pandemic. Last Friday the restaurant was celebrating its 30th anniversary. There's a lot to survive over 30 years, especially, if you are in the kitchen and continue to put your personal stamp on a business such as Boulevard.
Her longtime chief of staff calls me to inquire as to whether or not I was going to attend their 30-year celebration. I told Leslie I really did not have anyone to invite so I decided to stay home. However, I would come to work. I can wash dishes, run orders, or perhaps work at the host desk. She said she would call me back.
Leslie called back a day later. She and Nancy had discussed my proposal and had determined that I could work with her at the host stand. I assumed, accurately, they felt this was the safest place for me --- under Leslie’s watchful eye. ----- Oh boy ---- This is my restaurant fantasy coming true in real time.
My fantasy is the perfect job for me – no real responsibility, just welcoming people, being funny, chatting them up, all playing to my true skill set. The reason this is a fantasy is that being the host at a 200 settings a night restaurant is hard work. Leslie and Carly are amazing in every way. They are unflappable, calm under pressure, and orchestrating all that comes to them with efficient kindness.
You might wonder where I fit in --- with some difficulty!!! My first challenge was getting the table numbers correct. I don’t have any issue with counting from 1-50 but when the tables with corresponding numbers are place in what appears to be random order, that is a challenge. Getting people seated is only one aspect of controlling the flow of a dining room, which is not always predictable. I must say it actually turned out pretty well. I take instructions well and don't mind doing the little things.
This is not a story about what I was able to achieve, but it is a story about the human connectivity that happens in a restaurant literally every minute. For each person that walks in there's a story. If you choose to be involved in the story, it makes it all that much richer….. case in point
Around seven-thirty, three attractive women walked into the restaurant. They were well dressed and clearly good friends out for an evening. For me the best initial part was that they were being seated at table number two which was a table I had no trouble finding because it was after one and before three. Later on in the evening, they were still at table two. As it was approaching ten-thirty and the restaurant was slowing down I decided, not uncharacteristically, that these ladies needed me to come by make sure their evening was as expected.
Here is what you learn when you bother to take the time to engage with other humans. These three women were not just three women out on the town --- far from it. They were three women taking care of themselves and honoring all that they do for their families and the community. They were honoring themselves and each other.
They all lived in San Francisco. They were staying at the hotel across the street and just happened to decide to go to the best restaurant in San Francisco on its 30th anniversary. Nothing unusual you say --except!!! These were not just women these were three mothers who had taken a time out from their duties to care for themselves. These three mothers had two children each. All six of these children were between 18 months and 6 years. Trust me they have a lot on their plate. The dads were on duty and these moms were smart enough to NOT come home at the end of the evening as that would have only forestalled their nightly bedtime rituals. Oh, did I forget to mention these moms are also full-time ICU nurses at the two finest hospitals in the city. I am in awe of these women. Partners, mothers and full time ICU nurses. They basically have decided to live a life of full-time caregiving. The most amazing part is that they were remembering to care for themselves because without them the rest would fall apart.
What an evening for me – living a work fantasy, watching the incredible staff of Boulevard work together seamlessly, and meeting three women that I hope are models for others.
Restaurants are a citadel of real human interaction and I was at the precipice of it all. It demands that you be present and available at all times which in turn requires your focus and energy. No wonder I slept in Saturday morning…
Thank you Nancy….Leslie, Carly, Amelia, Sarah, Katie and Carlos