Fathers…

Last Sunday was Father’s Day.  As a father, I rather like this day.  I especially like hearing from my children.  No presents, it is just nice to hear from them.  Of course, it is another opportunity to think about my own father.  Not that I need a holiday for that purpose but it is nice to think about him in the context of the community of fathers.

Father’s Day brings out the “you’re such a good dad” and “you’re an amazing father” – but not all fathers can wear that moniker.  In fact, there are a lot of fathers that seem to not understand their responsibilities when it comes to fatherhood and many just disappear altogether.  My father belongs in the “amazing” camp.  What qualifies to be in that camp? For my father I think it was his DEDICATION.

He was dedicated to all things in his life.  His family – wife, children, relatives – his career (he truly loved the practice of law), his athletic pursuits, and his brief career as a sailor…...

For some odd reason this man from the land locked state of Missouri (except for that river that defines its eastern border),  upon starting his law career in Los Angeles decides to join a yacht club.  The Newport Harbor Yacht Club was a defining institution for my family as we spent most summers living near the club.  I will stipulate that it was far less “fancy” then.  Today, increased wealth has moved it into another category of club.  We did not have a yacht but growing up, we did sail and race small single design boats as we competed with the other small clubs around Newport Harbor.

My father also sailed and competed.  He was dedicated in all aspect of this process.  During the summer the club held “twilight” racing series on Thursday evenings.  Races started around 5:00pm and ended around 8:00pm.  They were designed so the parents who were funding all this fun could have a chance. So, his family could enjoy summer at the beach, my father would drive from Newport to Los Angeles every day (a two to three hour drive depending on traffic). 

He sailed a boat known as a Lido-14.  A fourteen-foot sloop with two sails and best operated with two people. 

One summer my father signed up for the final Twilight Series.  He asked me to be his crew.  I was excited to be awarded this job.  Every Thursday he would leave for work drive to his office and return in time to change clothes and head for the club to get his boat in the water and head for the starting line.  We did quite well in this series and by the final Thursday we were leading the large field of boats. Tensions were high. I was not “scared “of my father but I was scared of messing up as I knew this race series meant a lot to him.  Even at a young age I could understand what it took to provide for your family’s vacation, continue to work and try to have a little fun along the way.  All of this took dedication.

I remember the late afternoon and evening well.  It was windy and cold as summer was coming to an end.  I think we both understood what was at stake for my father and in the end, we performed like a well-oiled machine crossing the finish line first and thus winning the series. 

Now my father was not necessarily an effusive man.  He was thoughtful, kind, and dedicated. However, on this night he was effusive perhaps bordering on giddy.  All the driving, all the complications, and all the sacrifice for this small moment and he had won.  What was even more amazing was how happy he was with me --- his crew.  It was a moment when everything went right ---- Until…...

I think I might have mentioned in a previous chapter that I had a penchant for locking keys in the trunk of the car at inopportune moments.

As we were cleaning up in the cold and dark of a windy September evening, I went to the car to fetch some warmer cloths for the ride home…. I did it again… locking the keys in the trunk I now had to go back and bring a dark cloud over this happy occasion. 

True to his loving heart but truer to his thoughtful dedication as a father, he was not angry.  Instead he was completely understanding of the situation.  He told me to get ready as I was STILL going to get ice cream to celebrate our victory.  I think this endearing gesture of understanding might have had something to do with the fact that my thoughtful, dedicated father had brought an extra set of keys. 

Wil Wright’s

Wil Wright’s was a chain of ice cream parlors in Southern California.  Sadly, it no longer exists but it was in my humble opinion the best ice cream parlor ever….

As my father and I sat in this ice cream parlor now warm in our sweatshirts discussing and reviewing over and over our sailing prowess and victory I remember the feeling of love and warmth for this man who spent his life of dedication to everything he did.

Years later as I write this story remembering every detail of that evening.  I can feel the salt water  on my skin, the warmth of my body overtaking the cold of the night air, the sweet sensation of victory and ice cream

But most I remember my dedicated father ----- He was an amazing father…...

HAPPY FATHER’S DAY

Love, Fred