A Laugh and a Smile

Developing and exploring relationships is all about extending yourself.   To be a little bit vulnerable and taking yourself out of your comfort zone,   Let's set the stage.

 I live in a small town just north of San Francisco.  Within this town is everything you need to live day to day.   There's a small hardware store that has everything you would possibly need out of a hardware store.   The additional benefit, unlike the big box store, is that people work there and are willing and able to help.  You  just have to tell them what you need.   I had a very simple job to perform.   I was gluing two pieces of leather together. This small job turned out to be the high point of my day. I walked into the hardware store and there was a woman standing at the counter.   “Can I help you?” she said.  My name is Lorraine.    I learned later that Lorraine grew up with four brothers and she was taking no prisoners.  She was insistent on knowing exactly what I needed help with.  I explained that I had a gluing project.  She escorted me over to a section of the wall that held many different types of glue.    What type of glue would you want?  I said I was  not sure.  I just wanted to glue two pieces of leather. She Googled the question  and gave me her opinion on the best product. At this point the owner of the store came over and added his two cents. She looked at me and rolled her eyes.  You know this is only my second day  she said.   Every time I get involved in a discussion of  helping a client,  he comes over and wants to bully me. Well, I won't be bullied.  She went on to tell me about her brothers and that she was having an argument with her landlord about a heater system that was not working.  She was not about to be bullied by either man.    Silly interaction you might think,  but I learned a lot about this woman in five minutes of just being willing to say what I needed, ask her questions and listen.  Her four brothers, the apartment heating problem, debating with the landlord about how much to lower her rent and that she was client oriented and was always willing and able to help.   None of her problems could I solve but it gave me a window into this person’s life that I might have never known had I not been  willing to listen and to be empathetic.   I like Lorraine., she was funny and  entertaining,  Lorraine was willing to be honest and a little vulnerable.  She was interested, but more than that she was interesting. That's how one develops a relationship have any kind.    I told Lorraine I'm going to figure out something else to do it at my house so I can come back and have her solve the problem.  In addition to a fun interlude, I learned a little about another human and I found a possible source for solutions to  future issues because I learned that  Lorraine is a problem solver.  You can never have too many of those.  She also gave me a laugh and a smile and you can certainly never have too many of those.

High value.